Halloween was yesterday, but please understand I have transformed into a werewolf today between the time change, the sugar hangover and perimenopause. 🐺
Yes I have no makeup on, am all broken out, can’t stand being on the road with any other drivers or the site of my husband laying down not doing anything, and am wearing a shirt that accurately says “most likely to steal candy from children”. 🍫
There’s been a change in the force.
I am not the same as the moms of littles anymore.
The parents with the toddlers just look young. The dads have that trendy broccoli hair. The moms have good butts in exercise pants.
I am still wearing Halloween leggings and quirky shirts.
But my kids walk without throwing themselves down and having a temper tantrum. For the most part.
No stroller is a beautiful thing.
This older parent thing is kind of the jam.
This morning my daughter and I went to a free community yoga class. It was lovely.
I was worried it would be packed, but only a few people showed up.
Showing up is always the most important part, and oftentimes great things follow. ✨
While I was a young teen and small for my age, my dad used to always make me eat off the kid menu or pretend I was 12 for the discount museum admission.
I had these free kids meal coupons for Golden Corral (12 and under), so it was in my very DNA to use them on my 15-year-old son and 11-year-old daughter.
Maybe my son is tall for 12, OK?
I was feeling confident at the counter as we paid. The ruse was going to work.
Until the host said “If she’s under 12, make sure you accompany her to get her food.”
He took the coupons though. What a homie.
I couldn’t believe when I actually got my son to the scouts meeting a few minutes early tonight.
Yeah, he didn’t have his uniform but he was there.
I dropped him off just to arrive home and see the text from him. “Come back! It’s Court of Honor!”
Court of Honor is a ceremony where scouts receive awards and everyone brings potluck items.
When I made it back with his crumpled uniform and a bag of jelly beans, I’d missed half the ceremony and we were too late for the uniform.
In conclusion, I received a merit badge tonight in the Parental Court of Dishonor. 🧭⛺
Every day, I am amazed and incensed by all the people on the roads going SO slow—especially in Old Town where I live. The name is fitting.
These people must leave extra early for everything or have absolutely no place to be.
Below the speed limit. Creeping along.
Inching towards a turn. Drifting ever so casually to another lane.
What do you mean they don’t show up to work with their hair wet?
Are you saying they don’t have this license plate frame?
Who are these ancient, snails-pace wizards and why must they torment me? 🐌
My baby went on a three-day camping trip with her middle school this past week, and couldn’t bring her phone.
So we didn’t call or text at all, and she has been glued to my side for all 11 years of her life.
Josie has stayed with grandparents and friends, but usually texts me good night or calls because she’s homesick.
This girl had a great time on the campout by the beach, and I’m so glad she’s spreading her wings and flying.
But also, I missed her so intensely that it surprised me.
Maybe it’s me who needs to snip the umblical cord as much as her needing to pull away.
Last night I had a dream that a big wave came and engulfed us both, and I couldn’t find her.
I felt she was OK, but I was waiting nervously to spot her in the surf.
The dream didn’t resolve, because I was woken up by Josie climbing into my bed in the morning for her typical snuggles.
I hope the ocean tide of life taking her on her journey is always gentle, and that ever so often the sea returns her to me. 🌊💙
This customer was just perturbed at Grocery Outlet because they didn’t have the one thing he came there for.
Look here, my guy.
The only thing you come to Grocery Outlet for is to get high off the joy of bargain Christmas candy in July or fall candles in February.
Anything else, and you are setting yourself up for disappointment.
I am realizing that true friends not only check in on you no matter the distance, but remember what’s important to you.
Things like texts to you on your kids’ birthdays. Following up to ask about that major doctor’s appointment. Your favorite candy just because.
These are the sparkling sea glass.
If friends are not all in, out with the sea. 🌊
You know….I think baby fever has officially left the building.
Babies and toddlers are cute and all, but there’s really something special about when your kids are old enough to go on rides by themselves, and on the roller coasters as a family.
My opinion was further cemented by a toddler already having a meltdown as we all walked into Legoland at the very start of the day.
And again when a little girl came up and dropped Cheetos into my stinky shoes I had slipped off and then cried because she still wanted to eat them.
And again when this dad couldn’t get the stroller he was pushing to move.
Remember all those baby snacks and bottles and diapers?
I am SO good babyless right now.
